I know I have a ton of work to do, but I’m thinking it shouldn’t be too hard, as in it shouldn’t be impossible. I feel like I know exactly what needs to happen inside and out of this project, I have intentionally designed mockups, and I even have a suggested starting line with the obsconverter module.
Then I dove into obsconverter/src/org/openmrs/module/obsconverter… or maybe I wanted obsconverter/web/src/org/openmrs/module/obsconverter/web… or mergeconcepts/something… what was I looking for again? Slowly but surely I was figuring out the whole module code structure and getting comfortable with it. Then I was reminded that this victory should have been mine a long time ago. Glen mentioned doing something with obsconverter on May 21st, the first day of coding, but then we got to talking about user stories, concept tables, use cases, community involvement, asking questions, mockups, and the presentation, then a new project timeline… All kinds of important things that did not involve one line of code. So, all of a sudden it is Tuesday, June 26th, and I found myself a little lost, but as motivated as ever.[1]
Tuesday night into Wednesday, things started breaking again when I realized the project was called “mergedconcepts” instead of “mergeconcepts” so I renamed it. In hindsight, maybe that wasn’t a good idea. I should have asked someone before I started trying things and making a mess. I was so excited to WRITE THIS CODE, but somehow I broke Eclipse again. I almost decided to quit and become a math major. Then I got this text from Tiny Hands International about two girls being rescued in Nepalgunj that put things back in perspective: “‘We went through fire & water, but you brought us 2 a place of abundance.’ Ps. 65:12…” I can’t help but wonder what those girls would do if they had the same opportunities I have. It is so frustrating when all I want to do is work on my project and I can’t because of all the fire and water, errors and exceptions that I don’t know how to deal with, BUT I know myself. I know I can do this, and that it will be worth all of this trouble even if it takes me longer than one summer.
There is one thing keeping me motivated. People. I know the people who are going to benefit from and be excited about my work. I want to give something back to this community of people that put its faith in me to finish this project.
[1] Beyoncé lyrics of the day: “There’s not a real way to live this for real// Just remember stay relentless// Don’t stop running until it’s finished// It’s up to you, the rest is unwritten.”